Blame games.

I'm well aware that i'm not perfect. No one is, but what i did was not fair whatsoever. You deserve better then me. I'm sure at the time, i thought that i wasn't doing anything wrong, because i would never do anything to hurt you. But with the lingering scent of alcohol on my clothing, i see that it wasn't such a great idea. My opinion is pretty mixed on this one, because it's not the worst thing i've ever done, for sure. But just because it's not the worst, it dosn't make it okay. I understand why you're not happy, and now i'm simply embarassed to say the least. Really, really embarassed. To say the least i've violated your trust, but you havn't been perfect either, i just havn't brought it up.

How about when you were drunk, and you were telling me how you'd love to fuck your boss, how hot she is? How about when you were standing there flirting with her, and how you left me with people i didn't know the whole night? how you said sorry, and it made everything alright. How i never brought it up because i didn't want to hurt you more then you had to. But thanks, honestly, for making me feel like shit. And showing your mom, did you REALLY have to do that? did you REALLY have to show her? I know you were mad, but that's still not fair. I know you were mad, but did i go telling my mom how you wanted to fuck your boss, and how attractive you were bragging of her being? Did i tell my mom how you were saying how all the girls there were so attractive, and how you ditched me to go flirt with them? NO. I didn't even tell you because you wouldn't even remember. You don't remember, and i'm happy you don't. You wouldn't be able to look me in the eye, and that's why i didn't. I love the way you look at me.

Your parents will never look at me the same way ever again. Like i'm nothing but a dirty slut or something of the sort. That's not who i am, and now they'll never know that. I sit here, hating myself, and you just put fuel in the fire. "Baby don't feel bad, i promise, it's okay, people do bad things". Yes, i'm aware people do bad things. Maybe i should tell you what you did, maybe i should tell you what you did, maybe you wouldn't be so proud anymore, always making yourself seem so much smarter and so much better then me. Maybe you wouldn't be able to look me in the eye.

You always have to correct me on things you know nothing about.
"you shouldn't straighten your hair right after you dye it"
"how would you know?"
"my sister dyes her hair"
"I've been dying my hair for years, and i used to be a hair model, i know what i'm talking about"
"whatever you say..."

do you always have to be right? do you always have to know everything?
I know you're smart, i know you're educated, but you have no right to talk to me the way you do.

You always put me down, make yourself seem so much better then me at everything. It's starting to really get on my nerves. It's almost as if you treat me like a child, and you're the teacher. How i know nothing on the subject, and you feel the urge to educate me. But truth is, i do know quite a bit, i'm not fucking stupid.

and how you bring this shit up,
he wrote on my chest and you have the nerve to try and tell me that i was so fucking wrong?
People make mistakes.

i'm sorry, and nothing can change that.